Milk and Madness

Hey friends, it's Nhi from the Milk and Madness podcast. You've just got me today. And what I'm going to go through is my experience giving birth and my two C sections. If you're someone who is pregnant right now, or you're trying to get pregnant and you're interested to hear more about being induced, what it feels like to go through a C section as well as natural labor, then I think you're going to get a lot out of this.

Feel free to jump around if there's specific things that you're interested in. Okay, let's go. The first thing I'm going to go through is my experience with birth plans and also just the learnings that we, my husband and I, the learnings that we took from our experiences. So with a lot of things in life, you can have what you're open to, you can have your ideal situation, what you would really like to happen, but just keep in mind that pregnancy, like so many things in life, it might not go the way you want.

So the biggest advice that I can take is do your research, talk to your friends, your family, find out what you are open to, find out what you are not open to, make sure that your partner is 100 percent across your feelings and thoughts about all those things and make sure that you're on the same page.

Because my experience was that, when you're going through and having those contractions, it feels A bit chaotic. You're trying your best to breathe. You want your husband to be able to answer any questions that the midwives or the doctors are asking with confidence that they know how you feel and that you're on the same page.

I think that is just so important. I think in terms of having expectations or wanting certain things about your childbirth and having your child plan in place is great. But I really recommend trying to not get too stuck on certain things happening because again, it might not happen and I suppose you don't want to set yourself up for disappointment.

I know for us Our priority was that I was safe and that our babies were safe. So on that day, in that moment, whatever the doctor recommended, we considered. We asked as many questions as we could. You can't ask too many questions and make sure that you are an advocate for yourself because I know it can be really difficult.

It can be quite intimidating when you're in the hospital and you're going through all this. There are people who are experts in the room. Yes, they can give you advice and they can tell you what they think would be the best to deal with whatever is happening in the moment, but ask yourself questions and make sure that you're an advocate for yourself.

So my first experience with childbirth was with my son, Kenzo, who's almost six. My husband, I went into with that approach that I just mentioned in terms of, as long as we're safe and whatever we needed to do to keep myself safe and Kenzo safe, we would definitely consider In that situation,

When you're getting late in your pregnancy, I think I was. Just over 38 weeks. In Australia, you go and see the midwife more frequently. So I think it was, I think it was every week or at times maybe a couple of times a week. Just depending on what's going on with your pregnancy. And so that last week that I went to see the midwife.

For the last couple of times, what they noticed was that my blood pressure kept going a little bit up every time I saw them. And so I was thinking, I'm not sure. I think I'm just getting nervous every time I go in because things are getting very real. But they sat me down and they said, look, your blood pressure is going up a little bit.

Every time we see you, it's not a major concern just yet, but if you'd we're happy to do an induction and kind of kick off that childbirth process for you. And my husband and I looked at each other. He knew what I was thinking because it was 38 and a half weeks or so. I felt ginormous. I was getting pretty tired.

I had been on mat leave for two months, so I felt ready. So we decided to do the induction and what happened was they said, okay, let's book a time. I think it was in a couple of days. If you haven't started natural labor yet, contractions. Haven't started, come in at this time and we'll start the induction process.

So we did that. I was offered the opportunity to sleep that night in the hospital, the night before the induction. But we decided to sleep at home because we thought , that we would be able to sleep better at home. But look, the reality is I didn't sleep. I don't think we both slept at all because we knew.

That it was such a big day and I think I was nervous and we were so excited. And , if you think you're going to get sleep knowing that you're going in for a plan C section or induction, then you're probably, let's be real. You're probably not going to, but try to relax if you can.

So we went into the birthing ward hospital the next day. I had my little maternity bag all ready to go. And we started the induction process. One of the things that I vividly remember, like it was yesterday, was that they did a sweep and stretch. So use your imagination. It's pretty much exactly what you're imagining right now.

They put fingers in, they do a sweep. I think it's to separate membranes. I'm not a doctor, but from my experience, they put fingers in, they do a bit of a sweep, and they try to stretch the opening of the cervix. And my understanding is that you've got to be a couple of centimeters dilated for them to do this.

And I think I was about two, maybe three centimeters at this time, all I can tell you from my experience is that it was so painful. I don't wish it on anyone. It was, look, it was definitely painful.

So look, your experience, it might not necessarily be painful because I've heard from other friends that it wasn't painful when they'd had a sweep and stretch. But for me, it was really painful. And I just, I cringe thinking about it right now. And that didn't do anything for me. A sweep and stretch can help induce labor, but again, it didn't do anything for me.

So then let's start the hormone drips to really kick it off. And to be honest, the induction process was quite surreal. It went from zero to what felt like a hundred straight away. So they put the hormone drip to start the contractions. When they turned that on, I went straight into contractions and it was relentless.

I know you're meant to breathe through contractions. It was really hard to breathe. I had the gas. There's this big tube that you can put in your mouth and they tell you just to really focus on breathing it in. And I think that's what's meant to really distract you. But again, to be honest it didn't distract me and for me it did nothing.

So I was in, I was induced and I went through that. What felt like, honestly, it could have been a week, but I think it was more like maybe 12, maybe 18 hours, to be honest, or blurry in terms of the actual hours that I was in. Induced labor, but I got to six centimeters and it didn't progress any further.

And the obstetrician that I saw right at the start of the day, when we went into the hospital, he'd gone home, finished his shift and he'd come back. And his name was James and I will never forget him. Then he looked at me and he said, Oh wow you're still in this. And I'm like, yes, James, I am, please help me.

And I was pretty exhausted by then. I said, look, I think we should do a C section. And my husband and I looked at each other. He knew that we were open to a C section, if that was the , safest way to get Kenzo out. So we decided to have a C section. Technically it was an emergency C section.

But honestly, after I had that chat with James. It felt, everything just felt a lot calmer. I really felt that I could trust all the guys there, the obstetrician and everyone was really incredible. I had the epidural, which I don't really remember, but my mom was there and she said it was for her watching.

It was quite scary. I remember she actually started crying because she said it was like this giant needle that went into my spine just to obviously numb everything, waist down. But after that, I was a lot calmer too, and I felt that was the right decision to have made. And so they get everything ready.

They ask you all these questions in terms of just making sure that there wasn't any last minute issues my husband was all decked up in scrubs.

I put this big plastic sheet in front of you so you don't see what's going on. And I didn't really want to see what was going on anyways, because I'm not great with blood. So that would have been really scary and stressful to me, but I felt like I was in good hands. When you're lying there going through a C section, it's quite a surreal experience because you can feel the pressure.

You can feel them putting pressure on your stomach area. You can feel the moving things around. So literally I think they have to move organs around it's quite insane, but it felt really quick for me. It felt maybe half an hour, 40 minutes in total.

And I remember looking at the clock and I'm pretty sure it was 30, 40 minutes in terms of actually just removing Kenzo from my body, but it felt really quick. And when they pulled him out, they gave him to me straight away. and I did some skin to skin contact.

And then they took him away, cleaned him up, weighed him and did all the things that they needed to do.

In that time, they were stitching me up and I hadn't lost too much blood. Everything went really well. And that was a C section itself. My husband. Look, I think he saw more of it, so it was probably a bit more stressful for him, but he was really calm, which was really great. And then yeah, we had Kenzo. So the recovery period for my first C section was, look in hindsight, now that I can look at it, really smooth, really easy.

I was reasonably fit before going through my first pregnancy. My core was pretty strong. I had spent some time doing exercises before, significantly before going through pregnancy. So that really helped. I'd recommend it if you have time now. If you're planning to get pregnant, try to get into the best shape that you can.

Try to focus on your core because it really helped. So I bounced back really quickly. I remember that I was on pretty strong painkillers, of course.

I remember walking to the bathroom pretty soon after the c section and I remember a midwife said to me, you're recovering really well. I was like, okay, great. After a c section, and this might be TMI, but I'm going to give you this information. It was really scary going to do a number two the first time and they really watch it.

They ask you if you've passed WIN straight away. I think it gives some indications of how things are going and also that they ask if you've gone for a number two and the strong painkillers that you're on can make you constipated. , and I remember going that first time, I was so scared, like how much pain am I going to be in?

You sit down. And thankfully, it wasn't as bad as I had imagined, or I was anticipating, thank gosh. But yes, that was my first experience with a c section. With my second child, Ambrose, who is two and a half, it was planned because we had considered all the factors, everything that we've gone through, and we felt that having a planned c section was the best thing for myself and for Ambrose.

And of course Ambrose didn't agree, , so we had a day planned. I was hoping to not have to go through any of that labor to, to not get fully dilated again or anything like that. But the interesting, and this is my personal opinion, but the interesting thing is in my personal reflection on it was that my body wasn't ready that first time.

Kenzo was not ready that first time. So I don't feel surprised that induction didn't work for me. He's stubborn. I'm stubborn. . And we just, we weren't ready. So induction didn't work and therefore we had a C section. With Ambrose, it was planned.

I was all ready to go in terms of the C section. And of course, a couple of days before the C section, I went into natural labor. And the experience was, honestly, it wasn't as bad as I thought it's not as bad. It wasn't as bad for me as I had imagined because my only experience with contractions was through the induction.

And so from my experience, the natural labor, , the natural contractions, they were nowhere near as painful or intense as the induction. So I remember that night I was in full nesting mode. I had put some furniture together, which I know I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help myself. And I couldn't sleep that night.

I remember tossing and turning and it was almost midnight and I just, what was going on? I just didn't think that I was going to go into labor. My water was going to break. I didn't think about that and that I was going into natural labor. And of course it did.

I remember I woke up and I walked to the bathroom. I didn't make it to the toilet. All this water gushed out. I said to my husband, I've either just peed myself, or my water has just broken and it's happening now. And so it was all hectic. I called my sister, she came over and looked after Kenzo. And we went straight to the hospital.

And the contractions were really steady. I was progressing really well. And when we got to the hospital, we were waiting for them to set everything up for the C section. The midwives asked me, Are you sure you want to do a C section because everything is going really well. Your body is doing a fantastic job.

And this is where if you've really set on your birth plan, this is where it can impact your decisions because straight away, my answer was C section. Let's do a C section. Because the whole pregnancy, my whole pregnancy with Ambrose, I was Set on doing a C section that was the only option in my mind.

And so I didn't even consider going through naturally, which in hindsight, I think, I don't know, maybe I should have considered it more than I did. So we did the C section, but from my experience, and I could tell you that the contractions and natural contraction didn't feel that bad. It was painful, of course, and your body is contracting is trying to push out a baby.

So it's big. But the contractions were a lot more manageable. I felt that I could breathe through them better than I did with the induction. And I don't know if it's because I've gone through it before. And with the second time with that knowledge, it made me feel maybe easier. I'm not sure, but we went and we did the C section anyhow, and it felt.

Longer this time. Again, I don't know, I suppose it was my second time, but everyone was great. I really felt

I really felt the pushing, the pressure. I felt it much harder this time. So I think Ambrose must have been really just embedded against amongst all my organs and everything. But I really felt a lot of pressure this time. And I lost a little bit more blood than last time and they got him out he was bigger than Kenzo.

And being my second child,, I was a bit more confident in terms of knowing that I can deal with things. And the recovery from my first C section was reasonably great. So I expected that too. Funny thing is it had been three years between.

The boys. And so obviously my body's aged three years. I would say I probably wasn't as fit as well. This time around, my body did not bounce back. And to be honest, it's been two years and I don't feel like my body has, I would say that it hasn't really bounced back either, but I know my husband and friends and family would disagree.

But personally, I feel that with the first C section, it bounced back so quickly and I was feeling really good again, much quicker. And second time around, it's just taken so much longer. I felt in more pain the couple of days after the second c section than the first c section. I remember when I started walking for the first time after the c section.

Again, it was pretty soon, but I was in just so much more pain and my body felt more tired. And yeah, that's just something to keep in mind if you're thinking about really spreading out the children. If you're thinking of having more than one. So that's my experience with the second C section. And I would say if you're thinking of having a C section, or you're thinking of having a planned birth, either way, it's about you being safe, and the baby being safe, and how it's, whatever it's going to be, the safest way to go through it, and get him or her out of your body.

But just try your best to not get too stuck in one specific way of it. So that's a summary of my experience having gone through the sweep and stretch, the two C sections, the induction, the natural labor. I really hope that you found that helpful. If you're currently pregnant or if you're trying to get pregnant right now, I wish you all the best.

All the best. If you have any questions at all about my experience, I'm happy to let you know as much information as I have to give. Just please contact me on contact at milkandmadness.com and I'll talk to you soon. Bye.